I have grown up in the age of the development of constant
contact and a world where no conversation can die. No matter how bad it wants
you to let it go, how bad it wants to rest in a place more peaceful. Instead,
it goes on, tied to a machine with any piece of life pumped into it. Meaningless ongoing conversations have so many
mediums to be transmitted that we never really take a chance to pull the plug and
let them die.
I feel like over the last 15 years I have watched something
so genuine and healthy turn into a sad, unhealthy, lifeless form that is
plugged into every machine, and even wirelessly, unable to die.
Conversations used to be genuine, and real. When I had something
to ask my brother, I would wait for him to get home and we would talk about it.
If I had not talked to my grandmother for a while, I would make an effort to
drive to her house, eat her delicious cooking, and have a real conversation
about life. After I spent the afternoon catching up on all of the family gossip
(because grandma knows all) I would say goodbye, and go home. The conversation
would have met its maker, and it would die. It did not die in vain, it just
past on, and went to where conversations are supposed to go, memories.
I remember when I was in middle school, and the internet
went into every home. This was an amazing breakthrough. After you got your
computer hooked to the phone line and waited for it to dial up. You watched it
dial, heard the crazy fax machine like sounds. Finally, after about 5 minutes
of getting online and your homepage loading, it was time to chat. It all
started with emails. You could send a personal message to someone and they
could receive it anytime anywhere, as long as they were tied to a computer and
phone line. ICQ was the first instant messenger that was popular in my area and
then went straight into a new and improved Microsoft Instant Messenger. I am
sure you all remember the green and blue head and body icons that came along
with it.
So, that’s how it started, you got yourself a new cool “Hotmail”
account and you were ready to chat. If
you were really cool, and had expensive internet, you could get an AOL account.
(I heard it was better, but couldn’t get to that level)
My first phone was a Motorola flip phone. It had analog
signal, and as long as you were in a good place for signal, and you had the
antenna pulled out, it was capable of making phone calls. The idea that I could
call anyone anywhere was wonderful at the time, but it is just another poison
for the already dying conversation.
In my undergraduate years, I finally got to the next level
of phones, color screen and even a camera.
During this time, a new concept had hit the heart of the genuine
conversation, Texting. I fought and fought about how dumb it would be to type
out a message. All I could think about is how much work that is, and I made the
decision, I will just call.
People started texting me, and I realized it was just like
email, I could send a personal message to anyone I want, from anywhere I want,
and they can get back to me when they get the chance. I don’t have to stop what
I am doing for this conversation, I can continue on my day, and have a
conversation without even putting effort in.
Text messages are one of the biggest culprits for this downfall of the
genuine conversation. Conversation had completely lost its mannerisms. There is
no way to judge the emotion in a text conversation, everything gets taken out
of context, and you are just left wondering if you had a good conversation, or
if that smiley face was sarcastic. We lost the ability to spell correctly,
enunciate, or even be honest if we thought something was funny. During genuine
conversation, if something is funny, we laugh… LOL, LMFAO, HAHA, HEHE, TTYL, BRB,
ILY, IDK, WTF. What a joke… This conversation deserves to die, let it.
During my junior year at Purdue, I was introduced to next
great thing… FACEBOOK. How great was this breakthrough. I could be friends with
people I don’t even know, try to generate a BS conversation with them, and even
act interested.
I could put on there
if I was interested in a relationship, and if I found a girl I thought was
attractive, I could poke her. Maybe she will poke back. She didn’t poke back. What
does this mean? Does she not think I am pretty? Oh I might not be pretty. Let
me find out real quick. So I post a selfie (I took 5 or 6 and got the best
one). AHHHH. YESSSSS. 34 likes and 14 people told me “great pic.”
This isn’t real Life.
This is us holding onto a dead conversation, hoping to find
some support from people we don’t genuinely want to talk to.
Since then, there have many so many new social media sites that
only let you post pictures or you have to live your life in 140 characters or
less, and all you care about is having more followers than people you are
following. That is real satisfaction, Right?
Even better news, about six and a half years ago, the latest
and greatest breakthrough for killing all genuine conversations became real.
The first generation IPhone. This put all of you mediums to constant contact
from text, to Facebook, to Instagram, (which works well because you can just
snap a new picture with your phone and post immediately) in the palm of your
hand. You can make these lifeless conversations go on and on, anywhere you want
and never let them die.
Over the last 15 years I have seen the development of Email,
Instant Messenger, Cell Phones, Text Messaging, Myspace, Facebook, Twitter,
Instagram, Vine, and any amount of other social media. And above all, I have
seen the slow downfall of genuine conversation to a lifeless, heartless,
emotionless, form of interaction that is only holding on by a thread. We never
let them just pass away and move on to MEMORIES.
I am going to make a movement to Pull the Plug, Disconnect a
Dying Conversation, and let myself cherish the memory of a conversation.
I am going to lock my Social Media accounts, and have
someone I care about change the password. I am going to start with one month and see how much I miss the social world.
I want to rejuvenate the life of the Genuine Conversation. I
want to have face to face conversations and real phone calls about things that
matter. I want to go see my nieces, nephews, and not rely on pictures online to
watch these kids grow. I want to
genuinely become a part of someone’s life, not just “Facebook Official.”
I
have spent 15 years, tumbling down the path to lifeless
conversations. I am going to pull the plug, and say goodbye to the
conversations that have no meaning, no emotion, no life.
Goodbye for now Facebook and text messages, I am moving on.
Dr. Moz
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